Four Decades on - the Horrible Truth about Childhood Abuse Victims and Its Affect

by Vivienne
(Swansea Uk)

Four Decades on, I'm still on the journey to try and heal myself from child abuse and domestic violence throughout adult relationships. Even after seven nervous breakdowns and many therapy sessions, I haven't spoken about the true trauma I have suffered. I've finally come to a point in my life where I'm seeking the help I need for complex PTSD.

Plagued by flashbacks and nightmares from different decades I know now I need help with this. I have been single for ten years and raised my children, who are now on their paths in life. It's time to heal myself; I hope someone somewhere will read my story and it may help them.

Nobody Deserves to be Abused! Every Child Deserves to be loved and respected! Society needs to protect all children and vulnerable adults.

Firstly, society often hid abuse when I was young. As I grew up in the 70s, adults often repeated the saying "children should be seen and not heard " in our house while I was young.

I cannot go into great detail of this abuse as it's too hurtful even to this day, getting abused and raped by my first cousin at the age of 8 when he was 16... I know some abuse started around the age of 6 with other family members this all lead to a childhood of early unhealthy sexual awareness. No understanding of how to protect myself and that it was wrong I was taken advantage of on so many occasions. This as well as having very critical parents "toxic" did nothing to help my self-esteem. I've always grown up feeling like I was damaged goods.

I had a relationship with a man nine years older than me when I was 15 and spent ten long Abusive years living with an alcoholic. Mistreated and feeling so so desperately unloved.

The heartbreak thing is I thought I had met a nice guy a year after my divorce. How wrong was I unbelievable this evil man has caused me so much pain and emotional heartbreak I still suffer from flashbacks and nightmares.

I'm going to stop my story here for a while as I need time to gather my thoughts and calm my emotions.

I wish all you survivors the best of luck on your journey to peace.
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